December 18, 2007

I dreamed about Karen last night, and this time it was about her and she was definitely there. Last time it was just her room full of cats that could have been dragons.

I was at a party in the dream, at my old house before the divorce. Karen was there. We sat together and talked. My ex, The Dragon, was there close by. The other guests gradually left until it was just the three of us. The Dragon began talking to me, but Karen was also trying to keep my attention on her. It was getting hard to talk to both. Karen told me about some craft project she was putting together. She was trying to figure out how to add something when she hit on the idea of using green twist ties. I said that was a real good idea. The scene shifted suddenly. We were outside. Karen was walking away fast, and I was following. She said I was never going to get the twist ties. I desperately, lamely, told her I didn’t know she wanted them right away. She began running. I ran after her, yelling her name. She turned suddenly, yelled at me to stop following her. There was a woman there, a biochemistry grad student from work, and she stepped in front of me with her hand raised like a traffic safety. She said: “You lost.”


As enacted by my internet friends siesam and girlwiththespatula. Thank you.

The dream ended right there; I was awake. 3:30 am. My head was clear. I remembered a meeting I had forgotten the night before. I tried to return to sleep. Time crept by until it was time to get up for work. tea_lime.gif I’ve got to stop drinking green tea sodas before bed.

I can see the chasing scene showing up in my dreams. I’d watched a movie of the lovehina.jpg Love Hina series in which the hapless Keitaro keitaro_002.jpg chases the object of his affection and she yells at him to stop following her? Check. Affection divided between Karen and the Dragon while still married? Check. Craft project? That’s Karen. Check. Chasing Karen? Check. Rejection? Check. “You lost”? Loser. Check.


4 Responses to “Dreamstate”

  1. joneddie Says:

    Well, what an interesting couple of nights I have spent reading just a little of your posts. I can identify with so much of what you write. Please give up on the young lady, she may well have sparked your move to divorce and that is the only good that will happen here I feel. Move on, be a little more positive or at least try to write this in some order that might be publshed, before you are happy and lose the train of thought. I sometimes write poetry; I can only write while in a similar state to which you are in now.

  2. O'Maolchathaigh Says:

    Elsewhere in this blog I quote studies on unrequited love, or ‘limerence’. One of the interesting things that comes up is that many poets and writers can only be productive in such a state, and actively seek out such relationships in order to write!
    I have given up of K – but I keep backsliding! Was almost suicidal the other day when I realized I was still in love with her and it actually felt stronger than ever. Sigh.

  3. doesitreallymatter Says:

    Hey T.M! This post reminds me of the movie “The Science of Sleep”. It might be theraputic for you to watch the movie. Gael Garcia Bernal and Charlotte Gainsbourg star as the “couple”. It’s about unrequited love and the Stephanie character makes lots of arts and crafts.

  4. O'Maolchathaigh Says:

    I will watch it. Thanks. My obsession dictates that I do everything.

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